FRIENDS. with benefits.

My current cover photo on Facebook showcasing my million dollar smile :)

Because talking doesn’t help me in the slightest and writing make things a little easier, please allow me to say things I’ve been keeping to myself for quite some time now.

Like a photo, every smile has a story to tell. Those I-am-in-love smile. Those sparkle in the eyes. Boy you got me flyinggggg. It’s not what it is if it weren’t for you.

For, as they said, we can’t have it all. Even in the movies or in our favorite TV shows, there’s always a little twist no matter how much we want things to go smoothly.


This is my love story.

FRIENDS. with benefits.
That’s how we are. That’s how we were.

It was hard. The kind of hard to the point that if we bump into each other, even a simple hi is hard to utter.. JUST BECAUSE EVERYTHING HAS TO BE DISCREET. Not like any other casual relationships, ours was bipolar. Very bipolar. If it’s a menstrual cycle, it’s not a regular one. By that I mean he doesn’t texts me regularly. Isn’t it sweet if there’s someone who’d ask how was your day? He only miss me when he’s bored (at least that’s what I assume). He sends the lamest quotes in the world TO MANY. He chats on FB, but never asked for my Skype. Then again, we’re cool like that. We kissed, we hugged, we’re okay. 

But then one day, when I woke up, all I see was this girl in a bikini searching for her almost dead soul with him (haha forgive me I’m making up words, I meant soul searching). You wouldn’t believe me how I coincidentally solved the puzzle. I feel like my heart was ripped out of my body. I was breathless for a second, yet I have no right to confront him because there was never US in the first place. I hate talking about my feelings but how else do I get over this?

A heartbreak all over again. Emotionally damaged, but for some reason, I still smile whenever I see his name on my phone screen, and good thing my heart no longer speaks of revenge.
Unfortunately, sorry to disappoint, quite a few times I did text him, you know the ones, we’ve been there, you press send and immediately think….

“Shit, why oh why did I just send that drunk text message?”  Hey it happens, com’on we’re just human, its pleasantly entertaining don’t you think?

I’m sick of no-strings-attached-casual-fling-part-time-friends-with-benefits love affair. I want a formal-romantic-official-you-are-mine kind of relationship next time.

Note to self: Cheer up! He’s just a chapter in your life. Just like reading a book, a simple turn of the page can bring you to the best chapter you’ve read yet.


Now on to the next chapter! :)